i see asian bodies on the screen
nameless, faceless, helpless, powerless.

porn actors getting fucked
teenagers showing off
handsome men almost naked
to be discovered, to be enjoyed, to be consumed, to be forgotten.

i see asian bodies on the screen
quiet, anonymous, empty, stale.

skinny youths from the orient
brown skins with rice field hats
buff men on a tropical beach
in need of evaluation, appreciation, validation, and salvation.

fuck you.

my korean and japanese body is named haruki; i am not to take off my shirt to be appreciated; i am not to pull down my pants to be enjoyed; i have feelings, voices, emotions, power, strength, insights, ambitions, security, freedom, agency, respect and love; i am capable of loving myself without your empty comments on the videos of me jacking off; i refuse to be referred to as a japanese gay guy because i am a queer zainichi transnational activist who can criticize the fuck out of your ignorance not to shut you up but to offer you an insight into the system of oppression; i take your compliments but i don't need your civilization or enlightenment that is really colonization because i have been myself for thousands of years if you can see how deeply rooted i am in our stories so i don't need you to discover and rescue me from my cultures; my body is so attractive to me that it keeps me from working out just to make myself feel sexy or showing off to strangers just to feel validated; my body is not an affordable product for you to do whatever you want; my body is a product of intricate stories, intimate love, intense struggles and invincible will to live and live and live. my body is mine.

so fuck you.